Introducing myself

[bambi16]

I am 23 and was born n raised a jw, got baptized at 16 and regretted it as i had vowed to sumthin without knowing any other options. My parents split up when i was 10 which i think triggered my depression for the past 9 years and it has got considerably worse since leaving the religion 3 1/2 yrs ago. All my family except my dad are witnesses and i dont speak to him as he is a selfish bastard. My mum wants a relationship with me where we are not seen out in public and she doesnt have to be a mother in any way! I told her either we have a proper relationship or not at all and she said we cant so i said forget it then, gotta think bout woteva's gonna help my depression. Had to take a yr out from wk so i could just enjoy life and not have so much burden as i was struggling to cope. Now working for my partner from home, it's the only way i can do it.Back in touch with my cousin but she doesnt know whether she will stay in touch with me if the elders find out. Was abused by an elder's son at 4 years old when he was 14 n he just wasnt allowed to answer up or go on the ministry which i think is disgusting! Met my partner on the ministry, i called on him and we started seeing each other just before i got disfellowshipped, he provided a way out for me. I lived with his parents and then we moved in together, I am also now engaged. was planning on going back in initially but after all the things i have read n how i have been treated, i hate that cult! need help to move past all of this n not let it affect my day-to-day life and to potentially get my cousin out of there!

[hole nu world]

Welcome Bambi. I hope you find it to be a welcoming and supportive community as I have. As far as family, at least they want some form of a relationship with you. Many here have lost everyone once they DA or DF. Your mom is probably very scared to lose her whole community, but isn't willing to totally ignore her daughter. It is your choice, but just something to keep in mind.
Very interesting way you met your boyfriend. Haven't heard of that before. At least he knew what you were into, so it wasn't an akward conversation.

[West Coast Lady]

Welcome Bambi

Pleased to hear you will not be going back. I went back after been DF for six years. It did not last long so I have now been out a further 15 years.

My sister is still in. I would love to see her eyes opened and to be able to get out but I don't know if she ever will. We were both born in. I was so indoctrinated that even though I had been out for 20 years I still felt obliged to defend the JWs, that was until I got round to doing my own research. So pleased I did.

Everyone here is very supportive and I think you will enjoy your time here.

WCL

[Stuart English XJW]

Hello Bambi,

I think that you alone have found a true positive result from field service, a future husband, well done!
I hope that we can be of use to you on this forum and I sincerely wish you all the best for the future - Regards Stuart.

[Appolonia]

Welcome Bambi, you have taken the first step towards a new life, and believe me there is a new life sans jw's, although they make you feel so alone if you leave them , but hopefully you will find plenty of people here who can understand what you have been through and are going through. it takes time i left in 2010 and through sheer determination and prayer i am a lot happier. i do not have any guilt feelings - any more, i still believe in God and his word in the bible [key word here - HIS]. yes i have lost my friends but there is a world of people out there - and yes good christians as well.

if you want to help people to leave, you could introduce them to ray franz's books - but since he is considered an apostate you can try Ron Rhodes 'reasoning from the scriptures with the Jehovah's witnesses, where it compares their teachings with what the bible teaches, sort of like you know - going door to door with their reasoning book.
or Captives of a concept. you can find these books on Amazon.com. these books helped me a lot.
So you do what you need to do get yourself through this - but it will get better.

Appolonia

[Enough52]

Welcome Bambi I understand exactly how you feel my mother only wants to be in my life when i can be her sister homecarer and I said but you can't be a mother to me..oh know I dropped her and her sister which her sister isn't even a Jw's...but I've been df for about 26 yrs now..got baptize when i was about 13 also..and out by 15 hummm...I choice to be happy and if that means without them so be it for me....so I hope you find peace and there are good people on this site who will help you get to where you wanta be..I'm living proof I been df but i still was walking around with some of there behavior until i found this site..so stay and meet new people....best of wishes.

[ScummyDross]

,...
if you want to help people to leave, you could introduce them to ray franz's books - but since he is considered an apostate you can try Ron Rhodes 'reasoning from the scriptures with the Jehovah's witnesses, where it compares their teachings with what the bible teaches, sort of like you know - going door to door with their reasoning book.
or Captives of a concept. you can find these books on Amazon.com. these books helped me a lot.
So you do what you need to do get yourself through this - but it will get better.

Appolonia

Appolonia,.
While Don Camersons book "Captives of a Concept" is one of the best books for a Jw to read, imo, he used to be a JW so I would think this would throw up red flags for any who are trying to skate around the "I cannot read info from an apostate" fence. I think he used to be an elder at one time I could be wrong.
SD

[JWdeprogram]

.....and i dont speak to him as he is a selfish bastard......

You have no problem getting to the point bambi16.....love it (,,,,selfish bastard LOL).....seriously though ,,sorry about all the pain but you sound tough and able to deal with it and then move on. Glad you are here on JWR...it has helped me a lot too. If you use the search box up above you will find so many people who have dealt with problems just like yours (and mine). Welcome and Ciao for now.

[Appolonia]

Thank you SD you are possibly right about Don Cameron, i dont remember since i have thrown away most of the books, as i feel purged and dont need them anymore.

however the point is that there are numerous information out there, one only has to do the research. i read those books when i was still a witness and wanted to find out the truth about the organization, if some one has doubts they will probably secretly read what they need to. There are many books written by non witnesses.

appolonia

[ScummyDross]

Thank you SD you are possibly right about Don Cameron, i dont remember since i have thrown away most of the books, as i feel purged and dont need them anymore.

however the point is that there are numerous information out there, one only has to do the research. i read those books when i was still a witness and wanted to find out the truth about the organization, if some one has doubts they will probably secretly read what they need to. There are many books written by non witnesses.

appolonia

I agree,
I just wanted to point out that he was a JW at one time and you know how the Jws would react to an Ex Jw being the author. Of course I forgot that the book is basically anti JW doctrine since it, imo, disproves Jesus selecting them in 1919 to be his and his dads microphone. So I guess the content alone would shock the "non seeking" Jw let alone the author. lol

SD